You may have noticed that the site doesn’t have a lot of content on it again, so I thought I’d explain my little “reset” that has occurred whereby Ive deleted all previous articles and posts (i did just left the pup play page!). There were some I regret deleting, and I should have left the ones about my favourite pornstars as they were a regular regular bookmark to wank fodder and quick access into my Pornhub libraries for me.
However, I wanted to hit a reset button. I originally set up the site as a T-shirt business and the designs were all going to be part of a “InnerPup” range. I thought innerPup was a good brand for a pup kink gear clothing site, as mostly when you buy a t-shirt or piece of kink gear, its very much a reflection of your inner kink and sex desires. The T-shirt and clothing business didn’t take off, but its still here in the links after a brief dabble making underwear with tails on the back, and hoodies with the same.
Then the site became refreshed for me and my ex bf pup Nutrix to blog from. The first idea as I introduced my new bf to pup play was for us to document our experiences, but then covid hit and we didnt really have any events to go to, and the site just sat there really.
The idea that I had, always rattled around inside my head, was that we would blog about our kink lives, and if we ever would have a number of sexy lads we played with, we would form a pack, and they too would contribute to the site and articles appearing on it with their own experiences. These regular intimate people in our life would ultimately satisfy both of our appetites for group and kinky sex, but would also benefit from our shared experience and gear collection, taken under our wing and including them within our family, or our “pack”. In pup-play a collection of pups make up a pack, and Ive always been a strong believer in polyamorous relationships, whereby I can love multiple partners and have multiple sex partners who I have.
Although Ive successfully introduced at least 10+ people into pup play in the last 3 years, we didn’t ever get anyone close to wanting to join anything resembling a pack. And its a shame because regular sex partners may have satisfied the ex’s sexual urges, which he experienced much more of, but that was going to be the case given the 20 years of age difference between us. Instead of regular play partners, new random play partners increased my anxiety of safety when I wasn’t present at a meet up. Weve ended that relationship in order to maintain our friendship, but as Ive just turned 50 ears old, and given I cant keep 1 relationship running, never mind a pack, is that what I am going to do going forward with “Innerpup” is keep it as my own personal blogging space. These will be my innerpup thoughts, my innerpup pictures, videros and other things i want to keep control of here on my own blog space and not at the hands of social media circles.
Its weird when you think you have less days in front of you than you have behind. And that causes me a whole load of panic, especially with the levels of anxiety I have because will I ever be happy in a relationship again? Will I ever actually find what I think i’m looking for (and again, how do you know you’ll be happy with something until you actually have it?) Will I ever trust them or myself to try? Do I even know what the hell I want? Nope.
So join me on this voyage of random sexual exploration with my thoughts about kink, pup-play and whats going down in groove-town.